Farewell Central time zone, I hardly knew ye

So today was by far the worst day of driving. I don’t know if it was a hangover effect from last nights near accident, or if it was that there was nothing to see, or possibly it was the tragic incident which started off my day.

The tragedy unfolded when I decided that I needed a haircut this morning. There happened to be a Super Cuts just across the parking lot from my hotel. Based on their name one would assume that they are good at what they do, in fact better than good, you might even assume that they are super. Had I known what I know now I would have never chanced myself on their establishment. I walked in and the girl started cutting my hair, then the other hair dresser came in flaunting her beautiful bleached blond mullet. This is when I started to get weary. I respect the mullet as a hair style, how can you not when it truly is business in the front and party in the back, but it is not the type of hair style one expects from someone who styles hair for a living (apparently only in Oklahoma). So I was so distracted by the mullatude going on in the mirror behind me I stopped paying attention to my own haircut. It wasn’t a bad cut, but far from super. When the girl cutting my hair asked if she could style my beard I said no (it is my prized possession and I don’t trust it to just anyone). So she said ok she would just trim around the sideburns. I though she was going to just trim the edge, but no she decided to shave a line between where the sideburn ends and the beard begins, think 1980s flat top with the lines in the side. I was in shock, who would do such a thing. I just got up, paid her, and left without tipping. I firmly believe in tipping, even if they don’t do a good job, but this time I couldn’t even give her a cent, I cant ever remember not tipping for anything. I made it out to the parking lot and started screaming, if you heard a noise around 9AM Central that was me letting loose. Needless to say I will never go to a Super Cuts again, not even if they prohibit mullets on their stylists. There is more to this story continued below.

The drive through Oklahoma, Texas and New Mexico was uneventful. All three states have high speed limits and the biggest city I passed through was Amarillo, TX. I was amazed by the amount of open space in all three states. Beyond that they all looked exactly as I imagined they would, Oklahoma was wide open and green, Texas was scruffy, everything was bigger except for the trees, New Mexico was cleaner than regular Mexico and very sandy/rocky looking. I knew that it would me much more wide open than back east, but I couldn’t comprehend how much more wide open it would be. Seriously you could look as far as the eye can see in all directions and see nothing but scrub brushes and tall grass. It was actually pretty cool to see it like this, it makes you appreciate what it must have looked like when the settlers first came through here. I got on Route 66 in Shamrock, TX and followed it for about 30 miles before I got back on I40. I got annoyed because the 2 roads run parallel and the road quality of route 66 was horrible and the speed limit was 10 mph slower. Other than that on the trip there was not much to do but think, sing along to the radio, and see the same 5 or 6 billboards over and over and over and over again. I got really tired about 2 hours outside Albuquerque ( or as they said in the underrated summer almost blockbuster The Goods, “Querquie, Captain Quirk.” I wound up pulling over about every 45 minutes to stretch and relax. If you ever drive cross country I recommend giving yourself enough time and having a copilot. I spend at least 8 to 10 hour a day driving as well as time spend in rest stops, getting food, toll booths, coffee runs, bathroom breaks, and tourist traps. That means that I am on the go at least 14 to 16 hours a day, then trying to see what I can of the places I visit, plus sleeping in strange hotels has left me mentally and physically exhausted. The drive home shouldn’t be that bad, I only plan to drive 4-6 hours a day and do some exploring along the way so maybe it will be more fun. I also plan on getting rid of the Kanye West on my ipod, that guys is a buzzkill. I eventually got to Querquie and got checked into a quality in. Because of the balloon festa all the hotels are booked and the prices are through the roof, I worked my magic on the girl at the desk and she cut the cost down from $140 to $65 (im just that good). I went to an Albuquerque local favorite called Owls and got their signature Green Chili Cheeseburger (which was out of this world) and fried mushrooms (amazing). I think I may start putting green chilies on everything, they act like bacon and make everything better.

I only ate one burrito today, at this little tortilla factory/restaurant in Amarillo. The place had tortillas coming straight out of the machine and into the kitchen. I think the tortilla my burrito was made from was less than 5 minutes old. I almost bought a pack of their tortillas still warm to eat along the way they were that good. OD says that I should have gone to get a 72 ounce free stake at the big Texan, but I was so annoyed by their 100 miles of signs that I wouldn’t be able to walk in there.

Beard Story continued:

Once I got to Querquie I checked into the hotel and decided to try and fix this epic beard failure. I got my clippers and headed for the mirror. I checked the clippers to make sure that they were on the right level, but something still didn’t look right. I was tired and just decided to get it over with. The first pass of the clippers took off too much hair, and I started screaming again. Apparently though they displayed level 9 they were really set to level 1 so the trim took it down almost to the skin. I had to go with the flow and trim everything off. I know it will grow back probably soon, I also know that I have no need for the beard in the southwest because of the lack of winter. When I was out here for grand council the beard was only a hassle, but I still feel different without it. I have had the beard for over a year and I don’t even recognize my reflection anymore. Hopefully I will have my Adirondack face warmer back before I return home in November. I cant blame this one on the girl from Not So Super Cuts, it was my own fault, but I feel like part of me is missing.

Tomorrow im going to the dawn liftoff at the balloon festa and then taking a short drive up to Gallup, NM to spend the night before I head up to Chinle on Monday. Does anyone else think it ironic that I get a day off of my rotation on the Navajo reservation because of Columbus day… think about that one.

-O